Preparing For The Run Of My Life


Oooo so dramatic. Sound so “life or death” one. Wakaka

Anyhoo, it’s nothing serious lah. Drama only. Just that in three weeks’ time, I’ll be doing my FIRST EVER 42.195km (a FULL marathon, folks!). Hopefully I’ll finish in one piece and within the cut-off time of 7 hours and still able to walk straight the next day. Miahaha

By the way, a marathon IS a distance of 42.195km. Half of it is called a half-marathon. A 3km run is not a marathon. A 10K run is not either.

I have to say that I’m having a panic attack now. Panic attacks means panicky training. In a bout of panic, I took a day off yesterday just so I could do a semblance of a hilly tempo run at Lake Garden. I call it a semblance because I did an 8:00min+ pace (when I was supposed to do a 7:20) for a “mere” 14km run! I’m seriously thinking of taking another day off at the end of March to slot in a bit more hill trainings.

3 loops around the lake and up the deer park on Wednesday and I was ready to throw in the towel. That was just at 10km! Zaini took pity on me and asked me to run together with him to Dataran Merdeka to get more distance. It was a sorry sight, me shuffling along slowly from Bank Rakyat back to Lake Garden.

You know you’re in deep shit when you can’t even handle the bump along Padang Merbok. T____T
Deep shit or otherwise, must look nice if take photo. At Dataran Merdeka. 10.45am. Wednesday. Just 1km+ left to complete my 14km run that day.
Despite being in Week 15 of an 18 weeks training program, I am now second-guessing myself. Am I doing OK? Is this enough? How will I fare? Should I review my training? I am so far from ready. The questions, self-doubt and anxiety aren’t helping me one bit.

I went into the training program feeling positive and almost gung-ho about it, but recently I am having doubts about myself. I attribute it to my less-than-strong mental strength mostly. That and simply put, pure laziness.

I mean, during the first half into the program – I’d push myself and managed to get on target pace or almost at target pace for my training runs. Heck! I managed to kinda near-achieve my target pace doing 25K at Newton too!

But now… have I burnt out? Feeling stale? I’m not getting any faster. Actually, I know I am getting slower. Waaaaay slower. I feel I’m not getting stronger either. Endurance? What endurance? At Brooks Half Marathon, I walked up all those hills! Lazy bum!

I also can’t help feeling envious at fellow runners who seems to be relishing their full marathon training. They all have progressed so far ahead of me. And I’m still stuck in a rut.

There probably isn’t much that I can do now, with a mere three weeks to the Malaysia Women Marathon. Other than try and inject a sense of false bravado and trundle ahead.

Ah well… good luck me.

Note to self : die-die must finish that 32km run that I have yet done, this Sunday. Plus, must run all the way up the hill of Taman Wawasan! Stop being a wuss!

Another note to self : despite all the worrying over this marathon, I can’t help but marvel at how far I’ve gone. From my first race in Sep 2011 to my first half-marathon in June 2012 to my first full marathon in Apr 2013! How going for a 20+km run is now done very matter-of-fact’ly. Slow or otherwise, I’ve finished 7 half-marathons from June last year to March this year! ^^

All thanks to the staunch support from Zaini and Raimie. Without their understanding and patience, a full marathon would not be reachable for me. *muaks*

Comments

  1. You seem to be in real panic mode leh... Not good. I suggest you take some rest instead of more training. You are doing very well in the first half of your training program and now you just need to belief in yourself :)

    I may be volunteering in MWM, sent my detail but still waiting for their reply. Even if I don't get to volunteering in this race, I will be there to show support.

    Hint to complete a Marathon in one piece...
    Put one step ahead of another, repeat it over the 42km :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Very panicky. Very not good. :(

      It's just that I don't know what happen. Things just slid... T___T

      I'll just have to pick myself up and dust myself off, I guess.

      It's great that you're volunteering. Actually, me & Zaini wanted to do so too, but there's the problem of sending & picking Raimie from school and I cannot volunteer on race day and so does Zaini. We're waiting for them to reply too. It would be great to help a bit and also run at MWM. ^^

      Thanks for the hint. Will try and remember it! hehehe

      Delete
  2. you worry to much, and too much drama lol.

    you will do fine based on your training, remember to enjoy your 1st FM and believe me you will get better with each FM completion.

    i'll be volunteering and cheering at MWM, see you soon there :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Drama wise... banyak berguru from seasoned runners/bloggers. wakaka

      See you at MWM. Pre-race & race day? Pacer ke tak pacer nanti?

      Delete
  3. Lina, I more or less feel the same. With having to skip training quite a few days in Feb, and this week pun kena rest sikit sebab calf strain ni, I feel saspen also. And yes I do feel envious, including of you... :P
    They say that our goal should be that we complete it (walaupun sedikit tercabar sebab Oprah completed her first & only marathon years ago with a timing of 4:30 mcm tu) hehe
    Good luck to us :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ha, tu la... Saspen tak tenth hala...apatah lagi sebab ada downtime last week. Missed that LSD with you too. :-S

      Yeah, everyone is saying not too worry much. Just finish. But but but... Mskcik takmo finish after cut-off time. Kesian kat diri sendiri, kesian kat my support crew keba tunggu gak. :-D

      Delete
  4. push through last part of your training, once you start tapper, you will feel fresh again. jia you!(^O^)

    ReplyDelete
  5. relishing their FM training ... hahaha! i so envy those folks, too, ya.

    as long as you complete your targeted distance during training, don't worry much about the timing la. but you just have to remember that during race day, perhaps you'll need to pick up the pace a weeeeeeeee bit.

    as they also say, the first FM may be the toughest but at least it will prepare you for your 2nd one. You'll know what to do and expect by then. so don't forget to do FM for SCKLM 2014 k! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. eih, you are not one of them ka? :-D

      FM at SCKLM next year? See how I survived this one first. Uhuhu

      Delete
    2. hahahahaha no way lah.
      i'm just so emo with all this marathon training that i fear i will break down and wail like crazy once i cross the finish line!

      Delete
    3. Cannot.

      Must look really good and full of smiles when reach finish line! Seeing those photogs will stop you from breaking down right? ;)

      Delete
  6. all the best kak lina!! u can do it...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Has. ^_^

      All the best to you on your future runs too.

      Kit lari HM sama2 kat Ganu, eh? :-)

      Delete
  7. aiyo so busy preparing for that run until you almost gone missing in action.. Mak Rempinator, how i miss you lah~~ :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. anyway, good luck to you lah.. sure you have no problem accomplishing this mission lah.. waiting to see your running photos bombarding my FB this sunday~~ :p

      Delete
    2. yes, you can do it!! tell Ruruosha to send you more green tea kit-kat to reward yourself for that important run~~ :p

      Delete
    3. This Sunday only training run... Mana ada photo. Wait till 7/4/13. Hopefully there'll be lots.

      Then, my ugly face will flood your FB kakaka

      If Ru send more green tea kit kat, Ah Hua would be green with envy at me lah! LOL

      Delete
    4. You are missing from blogs and watsaps!

      Delete
    5. Whatsapp only la... I still leave comments at blogs what.:'(

      Delete
    6. What green tea kit kat lagi?

      Delete
    7. No more green tea KitKats or she will get too fat lah! When she finishes the marathon, I'll go get her some Sky Tree chocolate! ^^

      Delete
  8. Relax Lina. This is your first marathon. Don't fret too much on the timing.
    enjoy yourself, finish in one piece and work on the improvements later.
    Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. First timer jitters Doc. Virgin lagi. Tu yg neves terlebih tu. Kekeke

      Ok ok I'll try not to over worry or overthink about it.

      But... Klu ikut my HM history, first time je la yg laju sikit... Lps tu sumer main main je. Makin sloooooooowwww.... :-D

      Delete
  9. Yeahhh Kak Lina... U r doing so well during your training n races before... Smoking me once b4... Ngeh2... Shud be able to finish your FMV Run within 7hours... It's totally doable... Momma Bunny is full of hidden potentials n must dig deeper ok... After all, it's mind over matter thingy... I'm sure your K-Pop Flower Boys songs shud boost yur spirit... Hehee

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dah tak dengar K-pop dah... Sekarang kita layan Bruno mars time lari. Tu yg jd pace main perasaan je tu. Wakaka

      Delete
  10. I clearly know what is panic attack. It is lousy feelings and I am known amongst family members to be this victim. They said I will always kelam kabut one.

    Eh! Are there many deers in the Deer Park? I am curious whether it is just mouse deer or the reindeers?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ada. Mousedeer got. Those deers also got. Biawak also got there. Kekeje.

      You know there's also a goat pen beside the deer park? The smell is marvelous!

      Delete
  11. It doesn't matter what happens in the full marathon, the truly astonishing thing that you have to keep repeating to yourself is this sentence:

    "Going for a 20+ km run is now done very matter-of-factly."

    Anyway, you still have lots of time to practice for Nara. :D

    Ganbatte, ne!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But oh that 20km run were done at such a tortoise pace. :-S

      A year and a half to Nara! I better buck up so my support zebra won't get bored waiting for be. :-D

      Delete
  12. I don't know anything about run, but I sure know how "panicked" feel like, haha!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now I'm in the panic mode every morning, when my users complain the system I prepared for them is not working :(

      I'm super duper busy, hence the lack of bloghop.

      Delete
    2. Yvonne,
      Ganbatte! Hwaiting! Hang in there!

      Busy with work hopefully will mean better bonus? :-)

      Delete
  13. lina, you have put all the passion in the run. Amazing. So blessed that your loved ones support you wholeheartedly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Best of luck, lina, gambateh. I give my moral support to you too.

      Delete
  14. You so serious ah. Take leave to train for the run. :)
    Go! Go! Go, Lina!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ala... just want to relax also lah and have fun at the park instead of rushing to/from work to run. :)

      Delete
  15. that is a real test for you...
    well I am sure you could able to do that.. talking about 7 hours run? I sit in the car for 7 hours and my butt will pain...
    Gambatee

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sit down for 3 hours, I also got butt pain. ;)

      Actually, I really cannot sit down for an extended period of time. I have a nice crack on my back that made it painful for me to sit for long. Running - can.... slowly lah... I am not a Kenyan anyway. LOL

      Delete
  16. There is no such thg lazy bum lah u.. kak lina adalah super lady.. training in hot sunny day yg plg I salute!! Kipidap!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. heeee....Sayang Bet

      I training time hangat sebab no choice. Kena sayang family jugak. :P

      Dah rasmi jam baru? ;)

      Delete

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